We have officially reached the last week in February. Monday Musings – Vol 24 is coming at you with low energy but lots of hope! Seriously though, how are we almost 2 full months down in 2021 already? While this is going to flow like all Monday Musings posts since Day 1, it’s going to be extra personal. I was hesitant to share specific numbers publicly because I know it can be triggering. For me, it’s hard to see someone say ‘we got this…’ and not immediately compare myself. That is the exact opposite of what I want to do. But because I’ve been so open about this journey so far, I feel like the vagueness isn’t the right answer. Bare with me as I continue to navigate what to share and what to hold closer to my heart…

How Friday went…

It went as well as we could have hoped! The procedure itself was only about 15 minutes, but I was under the entire time so I don’t really know how it actually went. Every person, from my nurse to the surgical techs to a random woman in the hallway, was SO INCREDIBLY KIND. I was very comfortable the entire morning. As soon as I woke up the number of eggs retrieved (17) was written on my white board. Dr. Oakes was really happy with it, and so were we! They gave me a souped-up Tylenol for pain {though I didn’t have any immediately after} and I’m REALLY glad they did. It’s like they’d done this a time or two and knew I’d be needing it! 😉 After I got cleared to go home, we went to Chick-Fil-A because duh…and then I spent the rest of the day basically not moving.

What this weekend looked like…

A whole bunch of nothing. I’m an active person — y’all are well aware of that by now. 10k steps? Always. A good sweat session daily? You bet. Sitting on the couch/chair/bed for hours at a time? HAHA no. Never. I can barely watch 2 episodes of a Netflix show without having to go outside for a walk after. But my body truly wouldn’t allow me to GO. I had every intention of doing a slow walk on the treadmill yesterday afternoon but there was just no chance. Luckily I was able to clean and do a load of laundry to feel somewhat productive. There was also no makeup, no showering {until later last night} and no bra.

Honestly, my boobs majorly swelled up after the procedure so even my favorite bra felt uncomfortable. On top of that I’ve experienced excessive bloating {see the pictures below}, some intense cramping and pure exhaustion. It’s weird because my abs/core are/were incredibly strong. Currently it feels like I have absolutely no core muscles and can hardly take a full, deep breath. I colored, drank a TON of light blue gatorade and managed my nausea. Enter Kyle. Kyle was a flipping saint. I couldn’t be more grateful for him. He took care of me, didn’t complain once and was on top of all the meds and liquids I needed. Safe to say, not like I doubted, he’s going to make the best dad!

The next steps…

Hurry up and wait. That’s what most of this journey is. Waiting. Something I suck at. I like plans. And nothing is really planned with all this. Lots is left up in the air. Wednesday and Thursday are BIG DAYS. They’re Day 5 and Day 6 post-retrieval. We got our call Saturday that 14 of the 17 eggs fertilized, 12 of those ‘normally.’ That means we have 12 embryos vying to get to blastocyst stage. We’ll find out how many really did this week. So we wait and see. Wait and PRAY. The number that survive to Day 6 will be how many get to be frozen. In my mind it’s the more the merrier! What’s next for me is to wait until my period comes. Could be this weekend, could be 10 days…who knows. From there it’s a call to the doctor and steps for a FET procedure.

Side note: not that there is any ability to dictate WHEN your egg retrieval is, a Friday is truly the way to go. I am just today feeling 75%, meaning I’m good enough to work. There is NO WAY I could’ve worked the 2 days post-retrieval. Maybe because I didn’t get too many side effects from the stim shots the retrieval really knocked me out, who knows? But if you’re scheduling a retrieval, be sure to give yourself AT LEAST the day after, if not 2, for recovery. Your body AND mental health will thank you. These 2 photos are 24 hours after retrieval. And proof of LOTS of bloating.

Random Ramblings…

• Started, and have 1 episode left, of Firefly Lane. It’s a bit graphic in parts and definitely had me in tears multiple times. The rating is there for a reason…definitely not a kid-friendly show. But the story line and the way it is shot is great. Kristin Hannah is one of my favorite authors ever so it’s no shock I’ve loved this. 9/10 recommend!
• If you’re curious on what we’re eating this week…so am I 😉 But really, I am pretty clueless since I’ve been a little pre-occupied. Here is what I’m thinking: Meatless Monday will be gnocchi & veggie bowls, grilled pork chops w/ veggies, Buffalo Chicken Chili, stuffed chicken breasts w/ sweet potatoes and homemade pizzas.

• Alcohol is not something I crave. Never has been. But damn it if I cannot stop thinking about a crisp, extra chilled spicy margarita. All weekend it’s all I wanted to drink. Of course it would be when I’m not really supposed to have any. But today is National Margarita Day so I’m making THIS RECIPE and enjoying every single sip.
• Also, I am sick of wearing socks. In fact, all I want to do is wear sandals and show my toes. Free the feet! My most recent sandal purchases are this woven blush pair, these neutral slides and I’m eyeing these classic black slip-ons. 

• The response I got to ‘anyone need any links/what can I help you shop for’ story I put on IG yesterday was INSANE. I thought maybe I’d get a few of you asking for things…not 60+. It was overwhelming, but in a good way! If you missed them, I did save them to my IG highlights, but here are a few of the most swiped-up-on collages from yesterday:

· XOX, Kristin ·